Home Commentary How to Fight Jihad: AnaBaptists & The Battle of Munster

How to Fight Jihad: AnaBaptists & The Battle of Munster

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Prince Bishop Munster
The Prince-Bishop of Munster. Notice the weapons and armor.

As I write this, the echoes of another radical islamists attack on the West is still ringing in my ears. Exactly, 24 hours ago, San Bernardino law Enforcement were actively looking for two radical muslims who had slaughtered 14 people at a Christmas Party.

Watching the news outlets go through verbal gymnastics to keep from calling this, “Islamic Terrorism” is actually humorous to historians. Sometimes one can see the motives by what is not reported. Does anyone reading this right now believe that the mainstream media would have withheld the descriptions of the attachers if they had blonde hair and blue eyes? Conversely if the attackers has been black, would the media have held that fact for 10 hours? I have my doubts.

Munster
Ancient City Of Munster Germany

This bizarre tactic has gotten so frequent, we use a code phrase when we see it. “Oh! It’s those crazy Lutherans at it again”. I have made this specific Lutheran reference publicly many times, but it isn’t by chance. And it isn’t anti-Christian. And it isn’t some teenage snark-game of saying something outrageous to get a rise from pops.

Christians used to behave just like ISIS and the Lutheran example is on purpose. When religion is being used for good, it’s very good. When religion is being used for bad, it’s very bad. And bad religion always goes down the same rabbit hole of, “I’m holier than thou”. Al Qaeda does it against the House of Saud. Shite’s do it against the Sunni’s. ISIS does it against Al Qaeda. And the Lutherans did it against the Catholics. And the AnaBaptists did it against…pretty much everybody. Just like ISIS:

Prince Bishop Munster
The Prince-Bishop of Munster. Notice the weapons and armor.

Breaking news —-

ABC Channel 7 Reports — Word is coming in that a militant religious sect has taken over a major, North American city and started enforcing their own strict religious interpretations. The Mayor, the Police Chief and City Managers have all been fired. Initial reports are sketchy but rumors are that a powerful, secretive political party rigged democratic elections to take over the city council.

CBS Channel 11 Reports — Twitter accounts from citizens inside the city talk of mass beheadings in kangaroo style court proceedings. Thousands of people are fleeing the town creating a refugee crisis of staggering proportions. Rising smoke from fires can be seen for miles outside the city.

St Lambert's Church visible today. Munster Germany
St Lambert’s Church visible today. Religious Radical’s were decimated in Munster.

NBC Channel 4 Reports — On orders from the Governor, a state of emergency has been declared. News crews and citizens with cell phone cameras show State Police vehicles driving towards the city in long caravans. All civilian traffic headed towards the city has been closed. All roads leading into the city are closed. A curfew has been declared for the county and martial law is in effect. The National Guard has been activated with surrounding states mobilizing their Guard units.

ABC 7 — Details are still developing, but we are getting word that a State Police convoy was attacked 50 miles north of the city. It is also being reported that militants inside the city have blown bridges and thrown up road blocks to try to keep the State Police out. Reports of sporadic fighting all along the city limits.

CNN — The President has convened his National Security team in The Situation Room.

FOX — Off the record sources in the DOD say this attack hasn’t been directly linked to any specific group from the Netherlands or Switzerland and respective intelligence groups are fully cooperating with the CIA and US Intelligence agencies. PAIR: (Protestant Americans Blah…blah Excuse council) released a statement saying this incident is an isolated event that shouldn’t be connected to other, numerous, isolated incidents. That doesn’t make a pattern. And you’re a racist for even connecting the obvious.

Munster
The Siege to retake Munster Begins

MSNBC — The leaders of the rebellion have made their first public proclamation and renamed the city ,New Jerusalem and have sent a world wide alert to any Anabaptists believers to make their way to the now captured City of Munster, Germany.

AP — The Priest, Martin Luther, has publicly disavowed the actions of the Anabaptists and distanced his Protestant Reformation Movement away from them. Catholics are being advised to stay home and to not congregate in large numbers. The Swiss Guard has doubled security around the Vatican. Munster burns.

RT — In an act of self-promotion, Jessie Jackson and Jimmy Carter are planning on leading a NGO based mission to Munster to negotiate the release of any Catholic hostages that might still be alive.

End News Break—-

By now some of you have noticed a few structural inconsistencies with this scenario. But the issues are dead on today’s:

Date: 1534
City: Munster Germany
Religion: AnaBaptists movement decides the Protestant movement against Catholics not holy enough.
Spiritual Goals: End of Days Cult without well defined central leadership.
Religious Holy City: Where they create it. AKA New Jerusalem. AKA Caliphate.
Marriage Practices: Plural Wives.
Religious Leader: A Mystic who saw visions.
Temperament: Violently intolerant
Political practices: Democracy only to facilitate a kingdom which is replaced by theocratic form of communism.
1534 Political Phonies: Jessie Jackson & Jimmy Carter. Ok…the last one I just couldn’t resist. Every generation has their version of douche-bags. I just can’t seem to ID who that was in 1534.

In historical books you’ll see this event referred to as The Munster Rebellion, Anabaptist Hysteria, The Bishop’s Siege of Munster, The Munster Commune, or as I call it, The Battle of Munster. I won’t rehash it all here. But it’s worth your time if you wish to read up on it in detail. It’s a hell of a story with lots of twists and turns and examples of crazy behavior right out of the ISIS / mass-media manipulation playbook.

Now for the Takeaway

After 18 months of siege, the Prince-Bishops forces stormed the emaciated city. Killed all the Anabaptists they could get their hands on. Executed the leaders by first securing their necks with spiked collars and then hot metal tongs were used to strip their bodies of flesh. While keeping them alive of course. Afterwards what was left of their soulless, heathen, bodies were hung in metal cages from the steeple of St. Lambert’s Church. The tallest point in town.

Cages for AnaBaptists Bodies for radical attacks.
Cages where AnaBaptists’ Bodies were displayed for radical attacks. Still visible today.

It was felt the cages would be a good reminder to any straggler Anabaptists that Munster wasn’t a welcome place to visit. The cages are still on display today. Hanging from St. Lambert’s Church as a warning against radical religious practices and how multi-culurlaism can be derailed by those with evil in their hearts.

Legacy: What ever become of the AnaBaptist movement some might ask? Great question! Today you will know them by their more common, surviving, peaceful sects: Amish and Mennonite.

“You mean the conscious objector guys who don’t believe in violence?”

Yup. How to you think they got that way?
Sincerely,
Marky
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“Shooting Guns & Having Fun”

Marky